Cunnilingus

Female Orgasm In order to be a truly great lover, you must be able to give good cunnilingus (aka oral sex or going down on her). We think the term cunnilingus is a little more old-world and romantic, far sexier than the locker-room appellations some people use.

Whatever you call it, cunnilingus is a vital skill. While not easy to master, the rewards of practice as well as success are great.

Getting ready for cunnilingus

Before you're ready to go down, you want to take care of yourself. First, go shave. Nothing ruins the moment like whisker-burn. Brush your teeth. Wash your hands and make sure you don't have any rough fingernails that are going to snag her in a sensitive spot.

If you're practicing safe sex (you are, aren't you?) get your dental dam and latex gloves ready. Also have some water-based lube – flavored lube is available if you're leery of her natural taste.

Set the mood. Remember, this experience is all about her – so let her know. Tidy up the bedroom. Light a candle and some incense. Put on Ravel's Bolero or your Barry White album, or some other slow sexy jam.

Getting her ready for cunnilingus

Women prefer to be excited so they can truly enjoy the experience of cunnilingus. So go slow – read the article on foreplay for more ideas.

Get her comfortable on the bed. Use your mouth all over her body. When she moans regularly, it's cunnilingus time.

Cunnilingus technique

Get comfortable just in case you're down there for a while. Make sure she's comfortable, too.

Now, take a look at the terrain. Spread her labia and examine her equipment. Your goal is to stimulate her clitoris, but not at the expense of neglecting the rest of her genitalia, or the rest of her body.

Go easy. Don't jump right on her clit. Flatten your tongue and give her long, slow doggy-licks all over her labia, vagina and clitoris.

Instead of licking her clitoris directly, lick the hood – the fold of skin that covers the actual head of the clitoris, which is too sensitive for direct touch (on most women). Don't use quick flicks – women want steady pressure. Ask for feedback during this stage of cunnilingus. That's the easiest way to get it right.

Take her clit into your mouth and suck it lightly. This can send some women straight into orbit. Look into the basics of clitoral stimulation to make sure you know the basics.

During cunnilingus, try sticking your fingers or a sex toy into her vagina. Use lubricant and short, firm strokes. Keep stimulating her clit with your tongue. Use a vibrator or your fingers to give your tongue a break -- but get back to licking as soon as you can.

Now – don't stop. Women need steady stimulation in order to reach orgasm. Every time you change strokes you throw them off their pace. So keep going.

When she's close to orgasm, you'll know. She'll be moaning, her back will be arched, she may grab your head. When the moans subside, don't stop, but change to a very light lick. She'll be exceptionally sensitive after orgasm. Women enjoy physical contact after orgasm, so even when you stop cunnilingus, be sure to keep touching her. And tell her how much you enjoyed yourself.

What to do after cunnilingus

If you've managed to bring her to orgasm through cunnilingus, congratulations! She should be putty in your hands.

If you didn't bring her to orgasm, congratulations! You've earned huge points for trying and for letting her know that it's all about her. Keep practicing and you'll be there in no time.

Check out the article on clitoral massage just in case your tongue gets too tired.