Anal sex advice

A lot of couples who are just starting out with anal sex are understandably nervous and tentative. Anal sex is a little intimidating. But with the proper preparation, anal sex can be enjoyable for both partners and become a welcome addition to the sex play arsenal.

Preparation for anal sex

Step 1: Make sure the anal area is clean. The easiest way to do this is take a warm shower and use some soap.

Step 2: Loosen up. The aforementioned hot shower, along with a drink or two and maybe a round of erotic massage, will relax the anal sex recipient and allow easier penetration.

Step 3: Have your toys handy. If you're using anal beads, anal dildos or butt plugs make sure they're clean. Get your anal lube out. Condoms, too.

Anal sex techniques

Start with a well-lubricated finger (covered with a rubber glove or a condom if you wish). Gently ease the finger into your partner. If your partner doesn't enjoy the anal penetration, now is the time to stop.

Otherwise, you can engage in prostate massage at this point or to on to anal sex.

Gently run your finger around the inside of the anal canal to help ease the anus open. Try to ease a second finger inside. If this is successful, you can break out the anal toys mentioned above or move on to anal sex.

The insertive partner must continue to be gentle when pushing into the anus. Use lots of lube and go slowly. Control the thrusting -- otherwise the receptive partner's sphincter may try to close, causing complications.

Anal sex toys

Some couples will prefer to use a sex toy instead of or in addition to the penis for anal sex. Individuals may use anal sex toys for masturbation. The same principles apply as outlined above -- anal relaxation is more important than pushing. Sex toys must be cleaned after use and when sharing between partners. As an added precaution, condoms may be placed over sex aids.

One additional risk from the use of sex toys in anal sex is that of losing the sex toy in the rectum. (Most medical school museums and emergency rooms have a wide selection of strange foreign bodies recovered from the rectums of both men and women, ranging from living rodents to milk bottles.)

Creativity seems to know no bounds in anal sex, but it is simply foolish to insert breakable objects into the anus. Serious injuries can result. If you do lose a sex toy in your rectum when engaging in anal sex, go to the emergency room immediately. Yes, it's embarassing, but the longer you wait the more difficult removal can become. And don't worry -- the ER staff have seen this before.

The bottom line is this: anal sex can be fun, exciting and safe. Or it can be uncomfortable or even dangerous. Use the proper anal sex toys and techniques to make the experience safe and fun.